I Married My Soulmate
He was my first true love! I can remember EXACTLY what he was wearing, all the way down to that gorgeous smile of his and that was… 25 years ago! My handsome hubby, Aaron, and I will be celebrating our 21st year of marriage on May 6th.
I knew he was my soulmate (and still do)!
As I reflect on these two decades together, I realize how blessed we are to still be together. It certainly isn’t by chance, it has been a lot of work, sacrifice, compromise (oh ya and HUGE personal growth!). And I would do it all over again! Just like anything else in life…
You get what you put into it!
After 26 years of being together, I could see how people fall out of love. We met when we were 18 and we both have changed so much and actually grown closer together.
We both know how important it is to nurture our relationship daily. We schedule times when it’s just the two of us and we don’t let “life distractions” overshadow the importance of the date. We dress sexy, show affection, Aaron opens the door for me, pulls my seat out and makes me feel like a princess. I love when he just grabs my hand (or I hold tight to his bicep) when we are just walking.
I still get excited for him to come home and since the beginning, I have run out to greet him! Still today I run to the door when he gets home because deep down, I’m genuinely happy to see him.
We really try to never allow yourselves to become complacent and we choose to never take the other person for granted. It is the smallest everyday actions we take to show each other how much we cherish, respect and love one another. Even when there are times we could just strangle each other because there are those times in all relationships.
When things get challenging.
The past two years have been some of the most challenging years. Anyone who has teens can probably relate. We have three children: Nicole 26, Devon 19, and Dylan 15. We have two teen boys in the house right now. We love our children with every fibre of our being, they are our life. Thank goodness because living with two teens brings challenges of its own. Not just with the changes they go through as teens but the growth we experience as a parent in the transition from children to teens. But,
We never gave up even when there were times it might have seemed easier to throw the towel in.
The one thing I remind myself when things get challenging is “what am I focusing on”? If it’s all his faults, which I was so eager to overlook when we first fell in love, then those things will be magnified. Once I turn my attention to everything I LOVE about him (and there is a TON!), our relationship shifts back into alignment and I get to fall in love with him over & over again.
We love to laugh together – We still crack up at each other’s jokes! I must admit, he is pretty funny!
In a relationship, you focus to operate as 2 separate individuals or pillars that form the foundation on which you build everything else. If the pillars are weak, tired, stressed, and drained, the load becomes exponentially more difficult for the other pillar. So, what works for us is to make an effort to take care of our personal health and identity with hobbies, sports, outdoor activities, girls getaways, and boys weekend to nurture ourselves. We have found that by being strong in yourself first, it offers a strong support for everything else in life we tackle together.
Take care of yourself, be emotionally strong independently, laugh together, date each other, show affection and above all, focus on the reasons you fell in love in the very beginning. These are the building blocks for a life of love and happiness with your soulmate.
Cheers to being in love, finding love and a lifetime of love and happiness for each of us!